Good morning, y’all, and happy Friday!
First and foremost, thank you so much for your kind comments on yesterday’s post. The empathy and encouragement mean more than I can put into words, so I’ll have to make do with an epic thank you. Soooo…THANK YOU!
After yesterday’s introspection, I figured I’d go with a lighter topic today. A few weeks ago, I referenced the fact that Brandon and I had a Borat-themed wedding. A couple of you good people asked if we had more pictures of this momentous occasion, and indeed we do! (In fact, we have thousands. Our photographer was freakin’ amazing, and she took tons of awesome pictures.)
First off, the basics.
Wedding date: July 30, 2011
Location: Colorado Springs, CO (my hometown)
Beyond those basics, the most important element was cost. Brandon and I were both adamant about not spending obscene amounts of money on our wedding — the average wedding apparently runs something on the order of 20K, and there was no. Effing. Way. We were going to do that.
I actually wrote an entire blog about our low-budget, high-awesome wedding and my critique of the Marriage-Industrial Complex. (Warning: I was totally uninhibited in my use of profanity while writing that blog. If such things offend your sensitivities, I don’t recommend reading it.) It’s amazing how hard the wedding industry works to make women feel like they have to spend insane amounts of money on unnecessary things OR ELSE THEIR SPECIAL DAY WILL BE RUINED FOREVER — and as I delved further into wedding planning, all these things really started to piss me off.
I mean, really: I read an article on a wedding planning site (which shall remain nameless to protect the guilty) that carried on at length about how an inadequately decorated cake table can make or break your photos. I’m not kidding. It laid the guilt on thick (because what if you look back in 10 years, see that your cake table had insufficient decor, and then realize with horror that your wedding pictures — and by extension, the whole day itself — were ruined?!), and I quite literally sputtered in disbelief when I read it. I felt like I was living in an alternate universe, or that my brain was going to explode from being simultaneously flabbergasted and furious, or both. Needless to say, I couldn’t not write about it.
We also decided to eschew the Marriage Industrial Complex by getting totally unconventional and goofy. I inserted a Monty Python quote into the ceremony program, and we took the aforementioned Borat approach to our reception. The things we did are all based on this scene from the movie:
First and foremost, we had the wedding sack. Brandon’s mom took a close look at this scene to get a sense of what the Borat-n’-Pamela sack looked like, and she replicated it perfectly. It has the red tassel fringe, the goofy flowers, and our names and wedding date. (Someday we hope to get it matted and framed so we can display it with pride.) Here’s the series of photos showing the big bagging — check out the facial expressions of the folks in the background as they realize what’s going on.
One of our favorite scenes from Borat’s futile attempt to marry Pamela Anderson is the part when he says “But Pamela! I will give you your own plow!” Brandon had the awesome idea to Photoshop a picture of me into a picture of back-breaking manual labor while plowing a field. I’d taken some farcical, “Stepford wife gone wrong” pictures when I first bought my wedding dress, so he worked his Photoshop skillz to produce this gem:
After he was done working his magic with this, we got a poster-sized print of it, framed it, and put it behind our seats at the reception. If ever there was a centerpiece that sums up Brandon’s and my shared sense of humor, this is it.
So there you have it, friends: our economical and totally irreverent Borat-themed wedding. 🙂
I hope everyone has an awesome Friday!